Log in

02 January 2009 @ 12:10 am
Boy problems  
Help me out guys.

I've been friends with this guy (let's call him X) since 2002. Actually, we used to be classmates. We almost never spoke to each other. But in 2005 we went to the same Uni and we grew closer. In the beginning we were jsut friends, but for the past year we were something more. We suddenly started going out together to the cinema, ice-skating, cycling etc. I realised that I wanted to be with him, but I was confused whether he treats me as an old friend or also something more.
But recently, after we went to the cinema, I drove X to his flat, and he said that 'for our next DATE he would pick me up'. So he considers them dates. Cool. But why the hell, would he be telling me few days later about this girl from uni whom he fancies? I guess it's this reverse thing, where I should scream 'Nooo, you're mine!' and then kiss him. But it made me angry, so I just pretended as if I didn't care and basically told him 'good luck'.
Since then we met a few times, no mention of the other girl.
We went out for a dinner with my friends who had never met him, and one of them later told me that he's totally into me.
Later X asked me about my plans for New Year's Eve, to which I said that I was going to a house party. I asked him if he wanted to be my +1 and he said yes. But few days later he calls and tells me that his friends are throwing a party so he'd be going there. Which made me even more confused, because if you fancy someone, you don't cancel your date with them (unless you have a really good excuse).
So, I thought then that he sees only a friend in me, until a msn convo from a few minutes ago, in which he wrote "You're the one I want- O. Newton". So he's either playing with me, or just as insecure about this whole thing as I am.

I've decided that I'm not going to call him until he calls me first, but I need to do something about it, cause I'm tired of this constant playing.
Current Mood: disappointeddisappointed
f e r r i: [Cuddy] Sad Eyesalex_kingston on January 2nd, 2009 10:47 am (UTC)
I think there's definitely a lot of insecurity on his part and maybe to a certain extent he's unsure where all of this is going himself. I think you should umm go with the flow?
Though, now that I'm thinking about it again, it'd be easier if you talk to him again BUT as guys go, they don't want to talk. They want to chase. So play hard to get. He'll come and find you and realise what he's missing.

Edited at 2009-01-02 10:48 am (UTC)
Zosia: 24: Jack Bauer B&Wdisc0teque on January 2nd, 2009 11:02 am (UTC)
The problem is that we've been friends for 7 years now and we have some the same friends in common. I'm afraid of taking the next step, because if he rejects me, I won't be able to hang out with our group of friends :/
f e r r i: [Cuddy] Through The Looking Glassalex_kingston on January 2nd, 2009 11:07 am (UTC)
oooh dear that is a big problem. i had a recent problem as well with my friend of 10 years but she decided to call the whole thing off. as much as i'm saddened by it, i think it is the easier way out in saving our friendship.
i really think you should proceed with caution. if the two of you can be adults about it when things go bad, i say go for it. but if you think either one of you is not going to take it well better end things now before they escalate further.
Zosia: House: Cuddy in reddisc0teque on January 2nd, 2009 11:13 am (UTC)
at least i'm doing a different MA course, so i don't see him everyday.
the worst thing is that he acts sort of liek house. i never know whether his 'you're the one i want' is serious or he's jsut kidding.
like few months ago, we were sitting in my car and he kinda moved towards me, to which i giggled a bit. and then, witha big grin on his face he said that he was planning to kiss me, but since i laughed, i could forget about it.

sorry to hear about you and your friend :(
f e r r i: [Cuddy] Touch Her Hairalex_kingston on January 2nd, 2009 06:00 pm (UTC)
oh yeah thank god that you don't have to see him all the time. that'd be really hard.
and oooh mind games. that must be really hard. just take everything with a pinch of salt with such people. they never know what they want as well, i think.

and oh it's ok. we've gotten past it, i think. and we're back to normal.
Zosia: HUDDY KISS!disc0teque on January 3rd, 2009 08:39 pm (UTC)
i might get the courage to talk to him next time we meet. although, i'm sucha chicken shit that i'll jsut reptend that everything's ok :/
f e r r i: [Cuddy] Sad Eyesalex_kingston on January 3rd, 2009 08:49 pm (UTC)
Awww *HUGS* Good luck :)
Zosia: Spooks: Ruth+Harry KISSdisc0teque on January 3rd, 2009 08:52 pm (UTC)
i'll just end up dying alone and being eaten by alsatian dog, just like bridget jones ;P
f e r r i: [BSG] Laura phone smiley =)alex_kingston on January 3rd, 2009 08:53 pm (UTC)
But haha see Bridget got her man at the end :P
Zosiadisc0teque on January 3rd, 2009 08:54 pm (UTC)
true, it's my light in the tunnel :P
f e r r i: [House/Cuddy] Hugsalex_kingston on January 3rd, 2009 09:04 pm (UTC)
Keep the faith bb!
Zosiadisc0teque on January 3rd, 2009 09:06 pm (UTC)
i will my friend, i will ;)

i hate men, btw ;(
Kira-Iras: tv: Mythbusters - plausible signkira_iras on January 2nd, 2009 01:30 pm (UTC)
Uhm... difficult situation. Couldn't you... kind of... clearing the mist by telling him, that he confuses you with his actions? Nothing more, just to get a clearer reaction from his side. Maybe he doesn't even realize what difficult situation he creates.
Zosia: 24: Jack Bauer Collagedisc0teque on January 3rd, 2009 08:40 pm (UTC)
the problem is that i'm too shy to talk about my feelings. i'm not the heartbreaker type, if anything i'm the heartbroken.
i guess he is one too, so neither of us wants to make our feelings obvious :(
Kira-Iras: film: Pacte des Loups - path to the trutkira_iras on January 3rd, 2009 08:53 pm (UTC)
Oh, dear, sounds like me... but if the situation is painful and doesn't end just like that, you'll have to do something, even if it's hard.